Why do we find it so easy to hate? We hate our enemies, politics, religions, Brussels sprouts, and sometimes ourselves. Nowhere in the Bible are we directed to hate. Yet we are all guilty of some form of hate. In the Bible, “miseo” means hate. When we see “miseo,” it actually translates to “love less.” Mark 12 commands us to love our neighbors as ourselves. God is described as being “Love” in First John 4. God views hate as a serious and complex matter. God knows that uncontrolled hate causes conflict and division between men and nations. God has a much better understanding of hate than man can ever understand. God has a righteous hatred of sin, yet He asks that we forgive and love our enemies. Again, God has abilities, understanding, and power that we cannot fully understand. This power to hate sin and love the sinner is unique to God and reflects His holiness, understanding, and justice, highlighting His compassion and reconciliation for the world. If we are successful in choosing love over hate, we are approaching alignment with God’s character and teachings. In the Psalms and Proverbs, God’s hate is mentioned, which describes His hate for things that are against His holy nature, such as idolatry, unnecessary violence, murder, and other sins. God hates the sin and doesn’t tell us to hate, but to avoid the evil. God’s hate could be better described as a form of righteous judgment against sin. Man is warned in First John 2 that hatred is looked at as murder in God’s eyes. Not loving leads to spiritual darkness and being ushered away from God’s plan.
So how do we love those who drive us crazy and regularly aggravate us? We must first realize it will not be easy, but it is something we must learn to do to be completely at peace with ourselves and the world around us. There will always be someone who annoys and irritates you just by being who they are. Proverbs 12 and 19 address these people, saying it is prudent to ignore the fool and be slow to anger. There will be people in our lives who enjoy being difficult, intentionally aggravating, and pushing the limits. Proverbs 16 and 26 again address these people, telling us that a worthless man plots evil and a quarrelsome man causes strife. Unfortunately, we will have occasion to depend upon someone, and they will disappoint and hurt us. First Peter 5 suggests that we cast our anxieties to God and humble ourselves, allowing God to take care of the alleged shortcomings. Another unfortunate group we will be subject to is those who betray or intentionally hurt us. With these folks, we are reminded in Matthew 6 to forgive others their trespasses so God can forgive us our trespasses. We have all been subject to, or heard of, dealing with abusive, corrupt, and unskilled persons in positions of authority. Poor or corrupt management has long been a problem. Proverbs 29 talks about people groaning under the wicked rule. In today’s world, we seem to have more than our fair share of critics and negative individuals. These people have opinions, and most of the time they aren’t worth hearing. Why these people spend all their time looking for flaws and petty mistakes, and questioning your every move, is more than a little aggravating. When dealing with these critical and negative persons, we need to remember Proverbs 29, which tells us that the fool gives full vent and that we should hold back. Matthews 5 wants us to love and pray for those who persecute us. And then the hardest one for most people is Philippians 2, that we should do all things without dispute or grumbling. Finally, we have to deal with people who are just plain mean, rude, unapologetically stupid, and blatantly racist or discriminatory toward everyone and everything. Usually, your first instinct is to slap this person. As good as this might feel, it would surely cause more trouble than it is worth. In Ephesians 4, we are told to “let all bitterness and wrath and anger, and clamor, and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” First Peter 3 tells us not to repay evil with evil. So, what do we get out of making all these different efforts to love the unlovable in our lives? Is it worth the trouble? Seems like a lot of trouble knowing that the unlovable will not appreciate your efforts or, for that matter, not even notice the energy you have invested. Luke 6:32-36 answers this question, stating, “If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Highest, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful.” When you love the unlovable, God will grant you His grace, courage, faith, peace, and allow you to witness His love for you.